As we all know, I have a vintage Raleigh Commando sitting in my hallway on flat tyres - I'm ashamed to admit I haven't ridden it since I bought it, almost a year ago. My cycling mojo, it would seem, was stolen along with my Grifter. But it's coming back, oh yes it is.
Last night I had a dream that my brother got his hands on a brand new Raleigh Vektar, and I was unbelievably, furiously jealous. (This dream was probably due in part to the fact that our Matt recently picked up a signed John Piper print in a charity shop for £25, which turned out to be worth close to £2000, the JAMMY GET.)
When I woke up, I was compelled to check out the Vektar situation on th'internet, just in case the dream was a sign and I found one that was new old stock or mint in box for a fiver or something. I didn't. But I did find something else. Hang onto your hats bike fans, it's the ROADMASTER MOTOCYKE:
But there's more to this 1993 dreambike than meets the eye. For with a flick of a switch, the lucky owner could activate the MotoBlaster™ engine sound, enabling them to annoy the neighbours to their heart's content. I'm serious. You can watch this video here if you don't believe me.
Of course, underneath those moulded plastic fairings was a crummy old steel framed BMX style bike, which probably weighed a ton and certainly wasn't much to look at (see here for evidence).
Would I ride this bike? No*. Do I love it wrong, like Pepé Le Pew loves that cat? Yes. And that's about the long and short of it.
Incidentally, there's one for sale over at Re-Buy-Cycle, which just so happens to be the best bike shop in the world. If you decide to buy it, don't forget to ride it past my house so I can have a good laugh at you. Now go on! Get outta here!
*unless nobody was watching