Wednesday, June 16, 2004

how can you mend a broken arse?

Well, nobody stopped me and I went ahead and bought a bitchin' reconditioned original 1982 Raleigh Grifter complete with Sturmey Archer handlebar gear mechanism. Let me tell you, that SOB is one STURDY bike. I reckon if, due to my supremely rusty cycling skills, I collided with a car I would emerge unscathed but the car would crumple and burst into flames. Yeeeaahhh Boyeeeeeee

You look with your EYES, not your hands...

Don't be fooled. The chubby seat is surprisingly uncomfortable.

I find it hugely amusing to replace the word 'heart' in song titles with the word 'arse'. It's invariably funny. Observe:

Owner of a Lonely Arse
Shape of My Arse
Don't Go Breakin' My Arse
Total Eclipse of the Arse
Hungry Arse
My Arse Will Go On
Burning Arse
Keys To My Arse
I Can't Reach Your Arse
Straight From the Arse
Deep in My Arse
Empty Arse
Closer To the Arse
Cold Cold Arse
One From the Arse (my current favourite)

See? It's never not funny. Hehehe.
My computer is finally home. Thanks to the wonder of second hand furniture, I am perched on my nouveau wicker chair at my nouveau desk. Yay!


  1. Hi there,

    I love secondhand furniture too. Your blog is funny! Keep Blogging!

  2. Thanks! I love ALL second hand stuff. It's so much more INTERESTING than new. I foam at the mouth at the mention of a visit to a car boot sale. PWTHWTHWTHW.

  3. Owner of a Lonely Arse!!! LOL I've never laughed so hard.

  4. Queen's Sheer Arse Attack?

    Love your blog. I've asked Santa for some of your small knitted naked people to run around my studio with my sock monkey.
    Here's hoping...

  5. You are absolutely correct.
    I'm inspired.